Dirty Japanese

This book is seriously genius. Though it would seem at first glance a rediculous guide to communicate nasty pickup lines and scandalous statements in Japanese (although they definitely do exist), it's actually a very practical expression book and culture guide! But first, here's some of my favorite dirty phrases...hehe

What the fuck?
nande yanen
なんでやねん！

I am a pathetic bed wetter
watashi wa sho mo nai onesho desu
私輪しょうもないオネショです。

Shit, I'm really fucking baked
yabai ore itachatte iru wa
ヤバい、俺、イちゃっているわ。

That girl from the club gave me the clap.
kurabu no ko ni rimbyo o moratcchatta
クラブの子に淋病をもらっちゃった。

bukkake (skeet skeet skeet)
bukkake
ぶっかけ

I need to shave my bikini line
bikini rain o soranakya
ビキニライをそらなきゃ。

playing the skin flute
shakuhachi
尺八

Fucking cops.
poriko no aho
ポリこうのアホ

It's a biker cop!
shirobai da
白バイだ！

I know, graphic but hilarious. However, that's only about a third of the book. The rest is quite useful: casual greetings for friends, how to describe people (ditz, recluse, lazy bum), witty sayings, and things young hip people do for fun. There's plenty of practical phrases to get you by without sounding like a robot foreigner full of textbook-produced expressions (I know I need that). It's really a great insight to how the younger generation of Japanese people really speak among each other and what they're all about, although some of it may seem a bit strange and perverse. Like the author admits, "When you're among friends or fellow debauchers, let's face it--'Konnichiwa, yoroshiku onegai shimassu' is going to make you stand out like...well..a foreigner."
Dirty Japanese by Matt Fargo